Naturally, as humans we are selfish and greedy. We get married, but still cheat, we gamble and risk losing the money we earned, and we sit and talk about ourselves without asking others how they’re doing. All those aspects are, of course, not good, but communication affects me the most. There is always someone out there who everyone comes to for advice, to vent, and to complain to. People look at this person as a strong figure. To them, this person has everything figured out, they always seem calm and collected, and they’re always happy. These things may be true externally, but do not forget that no matter how strong someone is, they go through problems as well.
All we talk about is communication and how important it is. There are books on communication, classes, and even workshops but we still can’t seem to communicate properly, why? Because we’re selfish. We all have problems, especially being early adults. I’ve listened through financial problems, boy problems, break ups, family problems, and internal problems. We all go through it. One thing that was brought to my attention is that people just want to talk about themselves. Have you ever had a conversation that was supposed to be about you, but somehow it shifted to the other person? That shit is the most selfish thing ever. Why do you only get 10 minutes of comfort and we talk about the other person’s problems for 2 hours? Is it that people don’t care? Or maybe you’re just a good listener.
Guess what tho, that’s pure bullshit because as it was stated earlier, we all go through shit. You should be able to vent as much as the other person. Someone brought to my attention that people don’t worry about strong people. They never ask how they’re doing nor do they waste time sympathizing with them because they’re strong, and “they’ll be fine, they always get through it.” One of my friend’s friend was upset about something, and I said, “I hope your friend will be okay,” her response was “she’ll be aight, she’s always good.” Everyone should understand that just because I will be fine has nothing to do with the state I am now. Someone could be hurt, sad, or stressed and just needs an ear.
There are psychiatrists that go to other psychiatrists because they listen to other people’s issues all day, and they have no one to them listen to them. When you’re in dialogue with someone important, remember to share the spotlight. Communication is important. It makes people feel better, it decreases stress, and it could stop people from harming themselves or others. Think about how you go through things and how important it is for you to get those things off your chest. Now imagine not being able to translate that hurt into words. That person that you smother with your issues and not allow them to talk, that’s how they feel. There are a couple goals for this post. The first goal is to reach out to those who feel like no one cares how they feel. I care. The second goal is to listen more than you speak. The third goal is to know that you’re not the only one going through something.